Yesterday RadarOnLine.com posted a photo of Kate Gosselin and Steve Neild accompanied by an article entitled Kate Gosselin & Her Silver Fox Bodyguard Dine In New Zealand. In the article they stated that they were having a “swanky” dinner. That word is open to interpretation to the reader and I am not sure exactly what they were saying when they used “swanky.”
One thing I am sure of is that it was meant to suggest that Kate Gosselin and Steve Neild were having some type of intimate romantic dinner. The article went on to discuss Mr. Neild’s marital status and previous accusations made by Jon Gosselin that Kate and Steve were having an affair. I will give RadarOnLine credit because the picture and accompanying article did what it was intended to and created quite a stir among the non fan community and garnered over 600 comments on that thread alone. Many used this as evidence that “the affair” was real.
Of course almost anyone else that saw that photo and were not driven by “Kate hate” noticed right away that there were two little Gosselin children sitting in chairs right next to Kate. Not very romantic if you ask me.
This week TMZ reported that Kate Gosselin was asking for Jon Gosselin to be held in contempt of court because he is allegedly violating the judge’s custody order. It was interesting to me that RadarOnLine did not pick this story up. Especially since almost every other online site that normally reports on the Gosselins did including The Huffington Post.
I am wondering if Radar is posting stories such as the one of Kate and Steve out to dinner to please a specific person that might be assisting them in their quest to be the “go to” site with all things Gosselin (besides the fact that it works the non fans up into a frenzy and drives them to comment)? I am also wondering if Radar is not posting certain stories because they do not want to upset someone? Someone that might be the source feeding them storylines? Possibly someone that is a “pretty government worker?” I do have one piece of advice for whoever is Radar’s source d jour….. be careful for the tabloids are neither loyal or faithful to just one source.
I would also be willing to bet this was the hotel restaurant. These often look nice and swanky but they are just hotel restaurants. They are nice and convenient.
Maris S,
I guess we will just have to take their word for it that it was swanky because they did not name the restaurant and the picture really doesn’t indicate the swankiness of it all. 😉
Pam –
Well I’m insulted by this photo. They must think I am very stupid because they didn’t even bother to photoshop the kids out of the picture.
‘Swanky’ is anything above a drive-in window at Taco Bell!
HB,
LMAO, LMAO, oh my LMAO
…upon 2nd thought, has anyone suggested that Steve might also be a food taster for Kate? With that sort of venom, it might not be a poor idea.
I guarantee no matter where the dinner took place, a meal that includes children is not “swanky.”
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If they are under ten, it usually involves utensils dropped on the floor, at least one beverage spilled on the table, multiple trips to the restroom and lots of “Mommy, Mommy!”
The media seems to be talking about the “silver fox” just as much as Kate these days. Who was the one person that was so jealous of the good looking bodyguard? Just asking??
I noticed the lack of ROL picking up the court story too… in a previous story earlier this week they stated something like a routine court date for a custody check was this month… way to down play what everyone else is reporting… and people still think Jon and the un-pretty govt worker are not in bed with this site… ha! I am really waiting to see if Jonnyboy gets slapped with a contempt charge if he doesnt start selling Ellen down the river to save his behind.. it was all her….
But, but, but, but but, ROL is supposed to be in TLC’s pocket. 😉
Really, the things people make themselves believe.
I am wondering if the motion for contempt is going to stop Jon and Ellen from giving anymore stories. IRC, the last one was about how Jon tried to stop Kate and the kids from going to Australia. “That it was a slap in a face to Jon,” citing ROL, was tagged on every article I saw about their trip.
Goes to show that mob mentality is still alive and kicking in 2011.
I don’t believe for one minute that Jon tried to stop Kate from going on their trip. Everyone with common sense knows that trip had to be planned for months ahead of departure. I think a jealous person wanted Kate to look bad, and sold the story. If ROL had not reporeted it and everyone else picked it up, I don’t think many people would have known they were gone, until school started again. I sure hope the judge gets to the bottom of the lies being told.
I think ROL should totally disable their comments. It is bad enough the hate blogs exist, that they then crawl and slither over to gossip sites to post their vile filth and hate too.
It is over the top and some people are over invested in hating the children’s mother for anything they can.
I blame Jodi, Kevin, and Jon for breeding this hate and encouraging it. Jon and Jodi started these rumors about Kate and Steve to deflect from Jon.
The haters fed off of it. There are some serious mental cases out there that are unstable and I think Jon and Ellen are encouraging it, when they are hurting the kids encouraging their mother to be hated.
I don’t think Jon has his children’s best interest at heart.
I saw this link to Preesi’s site on Sage’s…
http://preesi.lefora.com/2011/01/14/contempt-docket-pdf/page2/
What do you think this means???
oops… try this one instead:
http://preesi.lefora.com/2011/01/14/contempt-docket-pdf/
To KateHate,
The comments you are talking about are the same people that post at those sites. Many use lots of different names to post so I really wonder if there are that many. They want to look like they have power, but if you read any of the posts they are just insane. I feel until TLC or Kate files a lawsuit for lies being told and spread, they will continue. 🙁
Well Judy, I guess this means that Jon must have filed. Not sure because I am not a lawyer.
Maybe we can get ROL or TMZ to explain it to us. Or the Blogging Lawyer. 🙂
This is pure speculation but I am wondering if he filed because he did not have communication with the children while in Australia…..hence the ROL article about Kate allowing Jon to talk with the kids. Again, pure speculation.
I am sure he filed this to ruin Kate’s trip with the children. he pulls this stuff all the time.Interesting thta the haters were having a fit about Kate filing against Jon, but think it’s great for him to file against her.
Carol,
I was just talking about that with someone else. They called Kate a hypocrite and all kinds of other names. The BL put up several posts about it and was very very angry. So out of control with anger over Kate filing. But now everything is A OK. Go figure.
Oh good grief. I can’t believe someone went and got that. These are the people screaming about privacy. GWOP put up a pic of the house before the Gs even moved in, WG posted pics of the kids and the house w/and w/o the privacy trees (and stalked them at the corn maze), and Preesi posts the court docket.
i just thought of something else, the TMZ story broke on the 10th. I don’t recall if it gave the actual date of Kate’s filing. Perhaps after he received notice he filed in retaliation. I know of divorced couples who did this to each other,
I’m sure kate is so used to Jon doing these kind of things and may be thrown out of court before he even gets there. This could be over a cs issue and nothing to do with Kate and the kids filming.
Well if cs means child support, I doubt it. Jon is the one who filed. Maybe he is just responding to the ruling that Kate won in being allowed to take the kids to Australia.
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You are right Lily.
Preesi herself probably went and got the court docket, she used to have photos up of the law office of Kate and Jon’s lawyers when they filed for divorce. It is creepy how far some of these individuals take their hate, to where they stalk, harass or cross boundaries assuming they are entitled this information or entitled to follow or harass them like this.
Damaged people do damaging things.
snickers, I agree with you. It is just a handful trolling and posting libel and blasting Kate at these gossip sites like ROL, JustJared,InfDaily, TMZ, using many moniker names to do so. Some of what they post is very disturbing and the amount of time some of them invest in doing that, is also disturbing. That they think what they do is okay, makes it even the more disturbing. To think these are grown women doing it and parents or grandparents, is soooo disturbing.
Disturbed people do disturbed things.
I don’t usually copy comments but I had to copy this one:
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@ Admin, do you know how far a gag order goes? Does it mean you are not allowed to talk to ANYONE about the case? Or you’re not allowed to talk to the media? Because technically Jon has a protected twitter account…he did not go to the media when he tweeted the news about losing the fight to get the kids off of t.v.
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Right, he just tweeted 80,000 of his closest friends so that makes it ok. 😉
Now that this info has been released, this Judge is going to get e-mails and nasty letters now. (already read that at Pressi’s) I for one would advise them not to go in this direction after what has happened this week. The Judge follows the law,and this has nothing to do with any poster on the net. This is a family private matter.
Pam.
LOL, and one close source to Jon.
LOL, yes. And that one close source to Jon. Pretty and a government worker…. that one?
@ Ann..add “sit on your bum & “I don’t liiiiiiiiiike this” & that sums up our “intimate swanky” dining out experiences to a T 🙂
LMAO @ the “Twitter Defense”
I can imagine Jon saying “Oh, but your honor, I did not realize publicly sending out a tweet to 80 thousand plus people that I don’t even know was violating a GAG order. You did not mention that my twitter needed to be gagged too.”
“Remember your honor, I am never to blame for anything I do, it is all Kate’s fault.”
MaryS..I guess photoshopping wasn’t in the budget. They are encouraging the use of hater goggles instead..
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Funny,
I will try to figure out why it is doing that. I am not sure if the judge is going to accept that. 🙂
Snickers-You’re right. When the TMZ story broke, I tracked down the ROL article on Jon’s tweets and this is the line in it >>Although a court order is in place preventing Jon to speak publicly, the father of eight feels Twitter is not a violation. “Jon told me, ‘I don’t feel Tweeting violates my legal agreement,’” a close friend of Jon’s told RadarOnline.com exclusively.<<
Pam, that pretty gov worker might have some explaining to do to the Judge. If Jon has whispered in her ear, and she fed the press, you can bet Jon will say it’s all Ellen’s fault. Hope Ellen has a good lawyer.
Thanks Pam, no LOL I don’t think that would fly with a judge either.
Oh, well I’m sure Jon’s feelings carry the force of law. I mean, his interpretation of the gag order is as valid and impartial as anyone else’s, right?
Pam-I can’t imagine ANY judge accepting I didn’t think tweeting was making it public. Another quote from the “close friend” in that article (posted at October 19, 2010 @ 2:00 pm)is >>He [Jon] said, “This is the best way I can reach people without publicly speaking.” If the quote is accurate, it makes it clear that Jon is trying to convey information covered by the order to members of the general public.
Obviously, I don’t know the terms of the order (and there is no way of knowing from the docket whether Jon objected to sealing the record or not). However, I think it is a reasonable assumption that one of the major purposes of sealing the record is to prevent disclosure of very personal and confidential information about the children such as school records, counseling/psychologis/psychiatrist reports, testimony (if any was given) by the children) to people who have no legitimate need or legal right to have access to such information.
Jon sometimes seems like a little kid who believes that if he covers his eyes and can’t see you, you can’t see him. He doesn’t seem to grasp that a family court judge must only have one concern: what is in the best interests of the children and that determination must be based on admissible evidence of record. If it can be proven that he and/or Ellen are encouraging people who are total strangers to the children to attempt to send ex parte communications to the judge in an effort to pressure him into deciding in Jon’s favor and are doing so by violating the court order sealing the record in the custody/support matter, that could actually hurt his case very badly.
…if answering to your quaint foot pounding makes me a hag, proud of it. Sick…disgusting…hate children…naw, that’s perhaps for the LOUD, ILL-ADVISED, and IMPOLITE.
to peggyp in response #37: i think the tweet thing has been addressed in court before…like right after he did it. and then he protected his tweets and that’s when ellen started posting about what they were doing with the kids…and not long after that (a couple months) the 8sources* started selling the stories to rol.
i don’t think this newest court thing has anything to do with that document from preesi. because we all know that kate did $$ out of the account per her lawyers advice and then she put it back. she admitted to all that when they were investigating jon’s $180,000 withdrawal.
maybe this was filed by jon to contest the judge’s ruling of kate taking the kids to australia over his custody time. or to please the anti kate blogs who are so insistent upon telling jon what he should do.
kate’s filing may have been in answer to that filing. and it was specific. not about filming etc but about custody agreement being breached.
it will interesting to see what happens with this one.
Sorry about that everyone. In trash where she belongs.
Does anyone really think Ellen has that much power? Also, why would Jon and/or Ellen be leaking any stories to the press when he just wants a private life away from the media circus that Kate craves? The truth will come out in the long run…and it won’t be pretty.
What kind of power?
The power to prevent radaronline from posting certain stories because they don’t want to upset Ellen, as written in the above article. That’s what power I’m writing about.
Sunfire, Jon tweeting to 80,000 when he has his kids and his court battles w/Kate isn’t demonstrative of a wanting a private. Neither was his interview w/the Rabbi. If Jon was wanting to live a private life, Ellen wouldn’t be involved w/the hate blogs.
Also, not sure about what power you are referring to, but it doesn’t take much to pick up her phone or email the tabloids. Ellen didn’t hesitate to email for a boycott.
It is not having any type of power. It is what journalists and rag mags do. They cater to whoever is being friendly to them at the time. Many of them do it. They also talk behind the scenes about it. Just like Polly’s friend Al did…. so do others.
Suzie,
I am removing your comment because you went too far. And just so you know, I have removed comments that have called Jon the exact same thing. I am confident you can express your opinion without resorting to that.
Does anyone really think Ellen has that much power? Also, why would Jon and/or Ellen be leaking any stories to the press when he just wants a private life away from the media circus that Kate craves? The truth will come out in the long run…and it won’t be pretty.
This much power to what – leak stories? That doesn’t take much power. Why would J&E leak stories when “he just wants a private life away from the media circus that Kate craves?” Because he doesn’t really want that, maybe? Because the media pay him for stories? I don’t know. You act like your statement (including dig at Kate) is fact rather than opinion. And then you finish up with the requisite Omninous Statement of Supposed Insider Knowledge. Dun-dun-dun! Sorry, been there, done that. Yawn.
The power to prevent radaronline from posting certain stories because they don’t want to upset Ellen, as written in the above article. That’s what power I’m writing about.
In my (limited) observation, the online tabs seem to cleave to one side or the other in these types of disputes (not just with the Gosselins). This, I would guess, helps them build trust and assures continued access. I don’t think J&E have any particular “power” over ROL, but I can believe that if they are cooperating with Radar, they may be getting some consideration (besides financial) in return, in the form of positive/slanted coverage.
Pam@IW, Didn’t realize this was a I LOVE KATE only site. LOL Can’t handle the truth?? LOL
Suzie,
Just would like you to be somewhat respectful. Can you not express your opinion without calling names? Or picking a fight? I see that ROL is shut down for comments.
Suzie,
It’s not a I love Kate site, but at least you could respect the blog owners. Now that’s the truth. Have a problem with that??
Can you not express your opinion without calling names? Or picking a fight?
I think the answer to that is NO. Lack of cogent arguments + lack of ability to argue coherently = all one is left with is their bad manners.
I’d love to know what this ominous “truth” is that the insiders love to dangle over their head. Considering where they are getting there info, their truth is not necessarily the REAL truth, IMO.
oops…THEIR info.
Once again I typed it wrong.. I meant to say “dangling over OUR heads”…
I am sorta a Kate fan. LOL I don’t think she should have taken the kids out of school when some are having problems. I have a strong feeling when she comes back they will all be home schooled because I can’t believe the private school would have given their approval for them to be excused for work. Kindergarten students working?
For the life of me I can not see 2 kids in the pic at dinner??
‘Sorta a fan of’ who? More worried about 6 kindergarteners missing 10 days of school than the twins missing 5th grade – touring abroad is WORK? What do ya bet there are 8 Gosselins who are bursting w. more new info than the rest of their classmates. IF they were all homeschooled – they could have perhaps stayed even longer!!!
FYI: If you can’t see 2 Gosselin children w. a 3rd’s hand near Steve…exactly what picture are you looking at? (Sorry Radar is down…life tends to play tricks when those pink bubbles go away!)
YAAY Steelers! That was one good game!
Eva,
Better blow up the picure. They are right there. I’m sure the school thing was all worked out before they left. Public and private schooled kids are excused up to two weeks at a time here in the winter if they want to travel with their parents. No one knows what the kids school did to help with made up homework. I have heard teachers complain that it takes a month to get kids back into the swing of things after a long holiday break.
HB, the sorta fan statement was the bait. LOL
snickers, yep…in celebration of a Steeler’s win, I was more than willing to be baited. ‘sorta’ w. ‘work’ & the illusion of a romantic dinner, & missing school…what more could a ‘sorta’ say? (Do you suppose 3 miffed Radar-rejects are the only ones in full withdrawal?) ;0)
snickers, ITA “I have heard teachers complain that it takes a month to get kids back into the swing of things after a long holiday break” It would be so disturbing if they had to repeat Kindergarten again. I’ll bet Cara and Mady are missing their classmates. Couldn’t Kate have waited till summer or does money come before her kids education?
It’s not my call or yours. Those kids will have so many memories to tell all their classmates. If a child goes on vacation for 2 weeks with parents, do you think they wouldn’t tell their friends everything when they got back. I don’t see your point, regular kids miss school also. We just had a fundraiser for kids to go on a missionary trip next month to Africa, yes, they will miss school for two weeks. Our church is paying for all the travel and the youngest is 12. Should we tell these kids they have to wait till summer. You can’t learn everything in a book, so I applaud TLC for giving these kids fun filled vacations and earning money also for their futures. Really, they will survive and be fine in school. The K thing is so overblown, you have no idea what the issues are, just a source close to Jon reported crap for a $.
HB,
O maybe!! 🙂
Couldn’t Kate have waited till summer or does money come before her kids education?
Well, it would’ve been winter in Australia then. I’m not sure the kids would’ve appreciated that. 🙂
Seriously, it’s unfair to assume that she’s putting money first, and as stated above, it’s not our decision. Gosh, people seem to worry so much more about kids they don’t even know than their own kids.
Suzie/Eva,
Please use one name and stick with it.
Kate went on national TV and told us she had taken 2kids out of school that they were having behavioural and anger problems. ROL reported she lied that the kids were expelled. Overblown?? That’s unheard of. I guess if you believe Kate, we all know what the issues are. Don’t post lies because it is not necessary and everyone knows what Kate told us.
I’m a teacher and I would take my kids out of school for two weeks in Australia during the school year in a New York minute.
Please, stop judging other families for the decisions the make regarding school.
“ROL reported she lied that the kids were expelled.”- Eva/Suzie
Kindergarteners don’t get expelled. A source close to the school confirmed what Kate explained.
I think Ellen has “the power” to withhold “Gosselin tips” from a reporter who doesn’t report unfavorably about Kate or flatter Ellen. Do I think she would be that petty? Yes, based on her complaint trying to get an employee of Taco Bell fired because she took pictures of Ellen’s boyfriend, “Jon of Jon & Kate + 8,” as she stated in her complaint.
Ann@IW, stop judging families?? Jon tried to stop them from going and the last I heard he is part of the Gosselin family. LOL The school NEVER made any comments about the kids dismissal and if you were a teacher you would know they could not comment.
Eva,
Kate told me nothing!! LOL. She said the school and her made a decision together for the benefit of the children. YOU no nothing about it.
KNOW^^^^^^^^^^
LOL, snickers. Why do you post as if you KNOW ANYTHING??
A source close to the school DID confirm that the children were not expelled, as I said.
“if you were a teacher”- Eva/whomever
I am a teacher.
Am I to understand from your defense that you are NOT judging other families who vacation during the school year?
Well, we all know that you’re not “sorta a Kate fan” as you claimed.
Eva,
I postd what I heard Kate say on the TODAY show. Guess you missed the interview. Now, mabe you will finally be satisfied, or sorta not, which ever it is.
LOL, LOL, a SOURCE close to the school. RIGHT. lol Were you the source. LOL
Yes, Eva, that is what I wrote: A source close to the school. No, I am not close to that school, nor am I a source. Someone else is.
I agree with you, PattyPie, that Ellen shouldn’t trust all the people she talks to and emails.
Eva is a ROL troll. ROL’s comments are down, so Eva and her coherts are out trolling blogs antagonizing and provoking Kate fans.
Pattypie, good advice for Jon, Ellen, Kate and anyone who is close to them. ROL is in it strictly for the $$$. That is not a bad thing necessarily, but just be aware where their loyalties lie and you can be sold out tomorrow. Also, 100% factual articles are not their primary aim — site visits, clicks and comments are.
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^^cohorts
Thanks, Alert. We kind of wondered what was up.
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I know some woman are very very obsessive about getting their daily (hourly?) Kate Hate fix (and yes, it is a FIX like a DRUG).
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Twitter hashtag — #howpatheticisthat??!!
Well said pattypie, look what happens when someone gets in trouble, has money problems and in rehab. The rags go after them until they ruin them. If Ellen gets caught up in this big game, she could fall really hard. Jon’s track record shows this.
Kate stories, particularly nasty ones which attracts what I call Anti-Kate Obsessives (AKOs) like a rotting road kill attracts scavengers, draw a lot of hits online and sells magazines when she’s on the cover. Just compare the number of comments on Kate stories to most of the others on ROL. If, as seems likely, Jon and/or Ellen are “The Source” either directly or through an intermediary, the threat of cutting off the flow of Kate/kids “stories” is a very formidable one.
Ann,
No they weren’t expelled. They were asked to make other schooling arrangments. They were asked to leave the school. Don’t use the word expell if you choose not to. But they were asked to leave because the school could not handle them. Sematics. Either way, a sad situation for 2 children that their emotional problems led to this outcome.
Eva, as far as I am concerned I see no reason to express concern for the children. They are well loved and well provided for no thanks to their dad. If you and your hater friends were truly concerned about abused children there are plenty of them in this world that could use a strong voice and decisive actions to help them rise above the situations they are in. The only thing you advocate for is hatred of a woman that you have never met. I cannot imagine spending hours of my day saying vulgar and negative things about anyone, let alone someone I have no personal ties to.
Molly –
People keep forgetting that this is a private school that needs/likes tuition money. What happens is that the parent and teacher work out ‘alternate education’ plan. The goal of the plan is to prepare the student to come back to the school and pay full tuition. The plan is supervised by educators at the school for a fee. That is not expelled nor asked to leave.
And certainly is some of these cases the parent just takes the child out and sends them to another school. It appears that Kate has decided to work with the children to prepare them for returning to school. Something that is made more difficult by whatever source is flapping their gums about expelled.
Molly, my grandchild is also in kindergarten this year and her parents are strongly considering pulling her out. She is having a very difficult time with school and she has never been on TV. I consider her parents to be excellent hands on parents and she is certainly not ‘abused’ in any way. Who knows what goes through the mind of a 5 or 6 yr. old child. To lay all the blame on Kate or filming for that matter is reckless and unfair.
Molly,
Having 6 6year olds in maybe the same class not only wold put a strain on the teachers, but the children themselves. All kids want to shine in the classroom when they go to school. All kids grow and learn and I’m sure the G’s kids will also. You want to label them, not the rest of the world. I have seen were kids were labeled in school from the very beginning of their education and it followed them all the way through school. So the sourse close to Jon did a bang up job didn’t they. I hope everyone finds out who did this, and maybe a new label will be put out on them for the world to see. Revenge, nah, just showing that adults that pick on kids are nothing but cowards.
The Gosselin kids go to a private school. Private schools in PA have no obligation to provide optimal, or even appropriate, educations to children who need alternative ed plans.
I have thought about this particular facet of the Gosselin story a lot. As part of my job, I help private schools try differentiated instruction for children who may not be succeeding. We meet formally every 4-6 wks to evaluate whether the techniques are working (and more often informally.) If not, we try something else. It is a great process, designed to help the children stay where the family wants them to be. Kate’s description/explanation was EXACTLY what I suspected: problems arose, working with the school, keeping up with the curriculum at home, even the timeline seems plausible.
I am certain that the word “expelled” came from someone very naive about how this private school process works. “Expelled” has a very negative connotation that leads people to assume the children are incorrigible. I feel sorry for them for being characterized that way, and for Kate who was harshly condemned as the cause of the problems. I do not understand women who insist on saying this while claiming they are child advocates.
It doesn’t always end up that the kids stay in the class they start in. This year, one of my students had to leave the school. There was absolutely no “judging” the child, parents, or the school. It was just not a good fit. We did find an alternative placement for her outside of the school that she started at. Guess what? She is in kindergarten, she wasn’t “expelled,” she isn’t ruined for life, she’s never been on a reality TV show, she is succeeding.
I have many children on my caseload this year. It is not unusual that children need something else. There is no shame in it, though I think some old-fashioned ideas persist that families are always to blame when children have behavior and “emotional” issues that are school-specific. Sometimes there is an easy answer, but more often it is a combination of factors leading to a child’s struggling in regular ed.
Snickers pointed out something very important that seems to be ignored: there are 6 children from the same family in that grade at that school. Have you ever heard of twins being put in separate classes when they are little? It is not uncommon for twins to be able to follow all the rules respecting all others EXCEPT their sibling in a class. The bond between siblings is oten too dominant to be forgotten by a 6 year old. This is normal. Does this private school have 6 kindergartens? I don’t think so.
I can think of other reasons why the setting didn’t work for 2 of them. What if they have learning and processing needs that are too great at this time? What if they are still too immature for a program with a challenging academic curriculum? It is not unususal for preemies to later exhibit trouble with certain academic AND BEHAVIORAL tasks. It’s not a certitude, but a possibility.
Under NO circumstances can anyone say that this is the direct result of perticipating in Kate+8. We can’t blame Jon’s year of living crazily, the sleeping arrangments at his apartment, Kate’s travel schedule, the bodyguard, tanning, TLC’s contracts or lawsuits. We don’t know nearly enough for people to blame anything.
My last point is this: blaming parents for how their chidlren adjust to school does other parents a real disservice. We have had posters here who have confided that they had children who struggled in school due to ADHD, autism, processing problems, emotional issues that presented in infancy, and cognitive issues. In every case mom was concerned and sought help, often fruitlessly for years. As a teacher, I found that working with these children has taught me so much about how other children learn, what motivates them, what to look for in assessing other children, how to write plans that work. In other words, they have been a blessing to my vocation. They help other teachers learn as well. They are treasured by their moms. Blaming these women, like KATE, makes other moms with such children feel like failures. Some confess they feel like they failed their children, that they must have done something wrong.
There is no shame in struggling at school. No one should be “blamed” because that implies someone is doing something horribly wrong and causing the child to struggle.
Every child can learn. The key is finding the right fit. Attending school at home is attending school. Attending an alternative ed class, resource room, private school, public school, having support staff in regular ed, online classes are all “attending school.” To say otherwise is small-minded and out-dated. It’s thinking that leads to blame and shame.
It is disheartening to read such comments. I see what the result is in front of me during these conferences. I do my best to couteract these negative assumptions so that parents don’t feel like failures and teachers don’t hold them responsible for more than they are.
I thank Kate for “setting the record straight” when she could have justifiably ignored the negative spin on her children’s reality. the way teh tabloids spun the story( “Ooo! look what perfect mommy has naughty children!”) was gossipy and cruel. I hope other moms who need to get help for their children model her willingness to change the ed program when necessary, without being embarrassed by the judgmentalism of their more fortunate sisters who build themselves up by putting other moms down.
Well said Ann. I am new here to posting, but have been keeping up with your site. What you said was spot on. As a former private school teacher that is exactly what I used to do with students that exhibited different problems. Thank you for explaining it. Hopefully the people who spew a lot of hate will take this in consideration.
Ann,
Very well said. As a Mother, and having children, if the need ever arose for my children, I would love to have you on my side. You are a true child advocate.
Thank you. And welcome to mdmama0223. Snickers, that was a nice thing to say. This particular role has become a big part of my workday this year. I have seen so many parents who seemed ashamed and fearful, unnecessarily so. I am lucky to work with a generous and compassionate staff who want to help their students and put their needs first. I also work in a great department with other like-minded women.
Ann, I’ve enjoyed reading your comments about the kids’ school situation here and on Twitter. Your school district is blessed to have you. What the people who are spinning this out of control don’t seem to grasp is when it comes to private school, each school is not a one size fits all as in public school. Of course, public school isn’t always one size fits all either, but it has to make allowances for those who don’t fit. Private schools do not. Just because two are having trouble doesn’t mean that they were “expelled”.. It means that it wasn’t the correct situation for them at this time. I’m an older mom whose son went to three different private schools in our area between grades Pre-K and 11 (he went to college after 11th grade.) Each school had a completely different personality and philosophy and a completely different mix of kids. Parents and teachers have to decide what works or doesn’t work. This is such a private thing and it never should have been made public at all, IMO.
Ann, you do sound like a school system’s dream! More important…a parent/student saving grace. I hope your comments will be saved for not just a ‘Gosselin’ response…yet using this Gosselin public fiasco does shine a light on a glaring lack of understanding by John Q Public. No doubt about it…’EXPELLED’ feeds the belly of the beast.
THANK YOU!
Ann, thanks for your comments. The schools, the kids and the parents are lucky to have you.
The haters seem to think that all behavior is learned. They ignore that kids are little people w/their own thoughts and personalities.
HB,
Your comments are so true. But even if the school released a statement (which is something I highly doubt would ever happen), the haters will still say that Kate and the ever poweful TLC made them say it. It’s just a shame that the children are looked at like objects instead of human beings.
Mdmama0223 (I just cut off the numbers–it gets too long to keep writing in.–LOL)
Ann-Excellent points. It isn’t that unusual for kids to have issues in school. I was very good academically but I was a klutz (it was a good thing they didn’t grade recess. I’d have flunked jump rope), a nerd, and a geek (too bad about the klutziness; if I could have made cheerleader, that would have been an antidote to the nerd/geek)
I know someone, who is now a very happy, well-adjusted newlywed has very severe learning difficulties. When he first started school, his parents had to make the school transfer out of his first grade class when they learned from parents of some of his classmates that their kids had told them that the teacher had called him a failure in open class (A FIRST GRADER!!!!!). Apparently she only wanted kids who tested well. His new first grade teacher was wonderful. Because of her and other teachers like her and a family full of educators and others with experience in the laws covering disability discrimination who made sure that he got the help he needed, my relative was happy in school. Learning will always be a challenge for him even as an adult but he has learned to face the challenges with courage and good humor. This was a public school kid.
I also know people in private (independent) schools as both administration, faculty, and students. One of the important parts of the process is the interview process and a significant part of that is to make every effort to ensure that the child, parent(s) and schools are a good fit. I know a little girl who was always very reserved and somewhat shy even as a toddler. The school she’s in is not only good in terms of academics but the atmosphere has done wonders for her social confidence. I doubt she’ll ever be an extrovert but she’s so much more secure and comfortable with people that it’s a joy to see.
I just wanted to add that when Jon tweeted his open letter his account was not set to private. I actually went and read it off his twitter page which if it was private I couldn’t have done because he has me blocked. Not trying to stir stuff up just wanted to clarify. And for the record I only went and looked because I could not believe that he did that and thought it was a media hoax and wanted to see with my own eyes. Otherwise I never go to any sites regarding them unless I click on a link unknowingly.
Well, thanks, IW posters. Craftymom, you are right, the tweet was open and I read it too. And, of course, I have also been blocked since the “Great Purge” took place, lol.