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Five Helpful Hints For the Spouse of the Crazed Baseball Fan

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Baseball tips for the spouse

Written by Jeff

Baseball season is in full swing. Time for a quick review of helpful hints if you have a baseball obsessed spouse. Baseball (unlike football which everyone loves, and basketball which everyone likes) is either a sport that you hate or love with a passion ( why is Verlander throwing Soriano a splitter when he had him set up for the curve?). I happen to be in the latter group. I watch 10 games a day (don’t tell my boss) and know everyone’s batting average to the 4th decimal point. As a lifelong Cub’s fan I can tell you who the 3rd string catcher was in 1977, but I have a hard time remembering my wife Pam’s, birthday. Wait, her name is Paula. I think…

5 helpful hints for the spouse of the crazed fan:

  1. Don’t ask specific questions: Say “How’s the game going?” Don’t say “Gee I see the Cubs are losing. What happened?” You have set yourself up for 20 minutes of detailed descriptions of bad pitches, horrible managerial moves and players that should be cut.
  2. Don’t say “Who are you talking to?” If he/she is talking out loud to the television – things are not going well.
  3. If he/she asks you to tell him if the batter was out or safe-play along. Watch the replay. Try to figure out (in the few moments you have) what he/she wants to hear and answer that way, or you’ll have to watch it over and over. Blame Tivo, don’t blame me.
  4. Once in awhile, offer to make him/her a hot dog or buy some peanuts for the game. You will be repaid tenfold. And Finally,
  5. Never, ever ask him/her if he/she wants to go to the mall during the game. He/she will look at you and wonder where you came from. He/she is not going, why ask?

We don’t expect you to be able to explain the infield fly rule – batter is out if the player hits a popup with the bases full or runners are on 1st and 2nd with less than two outs. But please don’t vacuum during the game or ask him/her to help fold the laundry when the game is tied. Don’t worry, the season will be over soon and you’ll have him/her back. Well, actually there’s always football season to consider….

Gotta go. The Game is on.

About the Author:

Jeff Buttikofer 1

Jeff Buttikofer lives is Los Angeles but grew up in the Midwest playing multiple sports including baseball, basketball and football in high school and college in the early 70s. He has continued to be a big time sports enthusiast but now days is relegated to enjoying it from his chair in his man cave with his five ( yes you heard that right, FIVE) TVs all bringing it to life in the comfort of his own home.

 

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Filed Under: Entertainment, Sports Tagged With: Baseball fan, Chicago Cubs, Crazed Baseball fan, Sports

Comments

  1. becca says

    June 7, 2014 at 11:42 am

    thank goodness the only sport hubby enjoys is racing.

  2. Robin (Masshole Mommy) says

    June 7, 2014 at 12:47 pm

    The funny thing is, roles are reversed in my house. I am the sports lover and my husband is clueless. He watches them with me, but has no idea what’s going on most of the time.

  3. Jennifer Williams says

    June 7, 2014 at 1:45 pm

    Great tips!! My husband is a sports fan but he is pretty good about walking away for other things (sometimes). He has not really gotten to see any of the games since we moved, they are all on too early thanks to the time difference. Crazy how much more family time we have now because of that!

  4. Veronica says

    June 7, 2014 at 1:46 pm

    Oh my goodness, my boyfriend is an over crazed baseball fan. he is trying to convert me too. I find myself “Raising The Jolly Roger” all the time and I don’t even know why. lol.

  5. Virginia @thatbaldchick says

    June 7, 2014 at 3:27 pm

    Great tips! I once asked if he wanted to watch a movie while the game was on. Ooops.

  6. Mitch says

    June 7, 2014 at 3:34 pm

    This is new ground for us as our 11 year old son has become an around sports fan and watches and talks about this all day long.It is foreign to us 2 dads!

  7. mel says

    June 7, 2014 at 4:30 pm

    My husband is such a crazed game fanatic. These are great tips! Thanks!

  8. kim says

    June 7, 2014 at 6:21 pm

    We are thinking about going to our first RAnger’s game this year and taking the little one. Go Texas Rangers!

  9. Curby Aardvark says

    June 7, 2014 at 8:55 pm

    Asking a man to leave the game is like asking him to willingly set himself on fire, it’s just not going to happen and he will look at you as if you’re crazy.

  10. Terry says

    June 7, 2014 at 9:23 pm

    Thank goodness my Hubs doesn’t go crazy when it comes to sports. He watches sometimes, but if there is something I want to do, he will do it instead.

  11. Chelsea says

    June 7, 2014 at 11:00 pm

    Hahah I totally needed this. I am so awkward with any sport and I definitely ask allllll the wrong questions.

  12. Carly Bellard says

    June 7, 2014 at 11:02 pm

    My hubby is not a big baseball fan. He IS a football nut! I just learned to leave him alone and keep the kids away as well!

  13. Jeanine @ sixtimemommy.com says

    June 8, 2014 at 6:23 am

    Great tips! My husband isn’t into sports much but goes to blue jays games often! So these may come in handy if he starts getting into it more!

  14. Rosey says

    June 8, 2014 at 6:56 am

    I’ve got a sports crazy husband, and if there’s nothing else one, he’ll watch a bowling or golf tournament, lol. Thanks for the spouse tips. 🙂

  15. Kiwi says

    June 8, 2014 at 11:14 am

    Men are sensitive about their sports…they are so emotionally invested in it…geez

  16. Dina says

    June 8, 2014 at 11:21 am

    these tips are so true. My dh just screams at the tv. I usually jump when he does and do not say a word. lol

  17. Janell Poulette says

    June 8, 2014 at 2:54 pm

    My hubby is a huge baseball fan. I am too! Unfortunetly our team is stinking pretty bad this year.

  18. Nikki says

    June 8, 2014 at 3:03 pm

    I’ve lucked out, neither of my husbands (I’ve had two) or my current boyfriend (boy, I’m really making myself sound like a winner here, lol) have been into sports. My brother, on the other hand, is a total sports nut and my poor sister-in-law gets dragged along for the ride. These are perfect tips for her!

  19. Beeb Ashcroft says

    June 8, 2014 at 3:45 pm

    Ha, too funny! I know nothing about baseball, and I truly mean nothing. I don’t even know what the bases signify. So, I would not be the one to ask to follow an important play and relay what occurred. LOL!

  20. brett says

    June 8, 2014 at 6:14 pm

    well, we don’t watch the cubs unless they are playing our red sox ;)!!! but seriously, asking questions like you describe actually got me into the game and i love it as much as he does now 🙂

  21. Renee says

    June 8, 2014 at 7:41 pm

    Thanks for the tips, but I will save them for football season! And, I know the rule about only talking when the commercials are on.LOL

  22. April says

    June 8, 2014 at 8:59 pm

    Great tips!!! LOL! My husband is a fan and my boys are becoming fans too. My girls even enjoy it. It makes me happy to see them happy so I go along with it. 🙂

  23. April Smith Decheine says

    June 9, 2014 at 4:50 am

    Ha Ha, good stuff. I have been married for about 26 plus years and hubby watches everything sports related. I don’t bother him or just move him into another room to enjoy his golf.

  24. Kathy says

    June 9, 2014 at 5:14 am

    I am just about the same sports fanatic as my husband so this goes both ways! Great advice for those who are not as big of fans as the rest of us!

  25. Tracey says

    June 9, 2014 at 6:01 am

    These are great tips. I don’t have a sports crazed husband, but definitely a sports crazed dad and brother.

  26. Brandi says

    June 9, 2014 at 10:14 am

    Hahahaha! Same for a crazed college football fan!

  27. MELISASource says

    June 9, 2014 at 12:00 pm

    I totally love these — and I can attest to the fact that they are all very true!! 🙂

  28. Onica {MommyFactor} says

    June 11, 2014 at 5:33 am

    Good tips to save some wives stress. Some guys are serious about their baseball time.

  29. Bobbie says

    June 19, 2014 at 6:40 pm

    Good tips!! I am so glad that we only have a one sport household and I think I am more serious about it then my husband. FOOTBALL!!

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