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Father’s Facebook Response to Daughter’s Disrespect

By Pam@IW

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By Samantha

Earlier today I saw the video below on a social network. You go watch it while I wait.

Okay- you watched it? Good. If you did you should fall into one of the following categories

1) You are applauding this father for showing his disrespectful daughter who is in charge and you think he’s a genius for using the platform she is so fond of.

2) You think she should have been punished, but the public video went too far.

3) You were with him right up until he shot the laptop. Nine times.

4) Teenagers are rebellious. Do your best and roll with the punches- everything will turn out alright.

5) I didn’t watch, but after reading #3 I’m going to!

Teenagers today certainly seem entitled. Smart phones, laptops, Ipads. Ipods etc. Some seem to forget those things aren’t “rights”. My grandfather had to quit school after the 5th grade to help support his family. He worked long days, doing hard work beside grown men, for 10 cents an hour. (I know I sound preachy.) This kid is complaining about light household chores, and she clearly took her anger way too far. The video was posted on February 7th so I’m wondering if he regrets the video at this point or if he stands by his decision. It was hard to tell if he had really thought the video through- or if he reacted quickly out of anger. Clearly he wanted to get her attention and stop this behavior in its tracks. I imagine he was successful. Although I have seen some question the validity of the video in the first place.

All teenagers get mad at their parents for things they consider to be unfair. I know I did. But there was no Facebook for me to vent on. If I ranted to my friends, there was no evidence. But I don’t think I ever lost my mind and showed that kind of disrespect, publicly or privately.

Like most, I was more than a little surprised when he actually shot the laptop. Why not take it away and sell it? I imagine he bought it in the first place! Then again- shooting it nine times made more of an impact.

So what are your thoughts on this public punishment? Warranted or too much?
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WARNING: Video below contains some  profanity and may not be appropriate for some viewers.

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Filed Under: News, Our World Tagged With: discipline, Facebook, Parenting, punishment, Relationships

Comments

  1. stxmom says

    February 10, 2012 at 5:31 pm

    As a Mom of a moody teenage girl. I understand exactly where he is coming from.

    • Timothy J. Martinez says

      August 13, 2014 at 8:04 am

      AWESOME Dad loved it shared it!!!!! Timothy J Martinez father of 5 daughters, married 44 years, 10 grandchildren 1 great-grandchild “Old School” 🙂

  2. Marnie says

    February 10, 2012 at 5:31 pm

    I had a mixture of reactions to this video. I was shocked that he had the balls to do it but I thought it was way over the top. But…….. The overall message is what I tried to focus on, he was being consistent and following through with previous attempts to discipline. I’d much rather see a parent willing to put themselves out there as the ‘bad parent’ than not do anything or make a million, likely ridiculous and never going to happen, threats.

    His Facebook page is open and it sounds like the family is coping with it quite nicely.

  3. GeeWhiz says

    February 10, 2012 at 5:55 pm

    I can’t imagine how I would react reading my teenager saying what she did about her parents when they are old. So mean and disrespectful. I don’t have a gun so I can’t relate to shooting the computer. That said, he showed her and her friends there are permanent consequences to bad choices which is a great lesson. I don’t think that happens enough these days. Seems a lot of parents choose to be their teens friend instead of their parent.

  4. Kmom2 says

    February 10, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    Love it!!!!!! I once took a hammer to my son’s cellphone (that I paid for) for disrespect truly behavior. The kid was flabbergasted! He said he never thought I would do it. I had threatened it, so I felt I had no choice.

  5. Kmom2 says

    February 10, 2012 at 6:01 pm

    I’m telling you, a little public humiliation goes a long long way with teenagers. I mean you can’t take it too far, but hitting them where they live like this father did is highly effective.

  6. Ann @ IW says

    February 10, 2012 at 6:02 pm

    Oh, I think the the fact that the video is so public went too far. No need for anyone but the audience for her rant to see it. But I do LOVE that he shot that kid’s laptop. The whole message- that her swearing, laziness, and utter disrespect for the adults who care for her is far more serious than shooting and wasting a laptop + upgrades- is one I can support.
    I’m not a cigarette fan, but it kind of works for me here too, along with the hat and the cowby accent.
    And I like his putting a bullet in it at Mom’s request.

  7. Marnie says

    February 10, 2012 at 6:29 pm

    Ann – I couldn’t agree more! Weighing the disrespect against the destruction of a laptop….. I’m ok with it. I don’t have teenagers, but I was one once, a million years ago, and I’m pretty sure parenting teenagers defies logic sometimes.

  8. rhonda0034 says

    February 10, 2012 at 7:01 pm

    I love it!!! Just had a bunch of lip from my 31 year old daughter who still lives at home and pays no rent. (oh and owes us $300.00 for a car repair – we took the car to the dealer, picked it up and paid for it because she had to work) Didn’t like the dinner I cooked, our house or my husband and I. Wish I had the guts to put a response to her rant on facebook for everyone to see. Her church community would be shocked!!! Just had to vent. This video was very timely tonight.

  9. Lily@IW says

    February 10, 2012 at 7:02 pm

    Shooting the laptop is too violent for me. I would have given it away. Other than that, he’s a tough dad and he made his point.

  10. snickers says

    February 10, 2012 at 8:30 pm

    It’s nice seeing a parent being a parent. Refreshing!! I would have loved to see him dunk it in a pail of water instead of shooting it. Taking control now at her age, she might learn something in life before the real trouble sets in.

  11. Linda says

    February 10, 2012 at 9:08 pm

    OMG. THAT WAS AWESOME I HAVE TTEENAGERS AND I COULD SEE MYSELF DOING THAT…I THINK WE SHOULD KEEP THEM IN LINE BY TAKEN AWAY ALL THE LUXURYS IN LIFE AND THEN THEY MAY WAKE UP…i THINK ITS A BREATHE OF FRESH AIR…

  12. HB says

    February 11, 2012 at 5:20 am

    Believe in tough love? Yes, I do. Believe as a parent that publicly humiliating a 15 y/o angry daughter is a step towards mutual respect? NOPE! With the mention of ‘stepmother’, ‘cleaning lady’ & ‘little brother’…sounds like there might be a whole lot of other family dynamics going on that aren’t resolved.
    /
    Pulling out a gun & shooting up a computer? I wonder what he’s like when he uses words in front of his family? There is such a thing as learned behavior.

  13. carol says

    February 11, 2012 at 5:47 am

    HB,completely agree, I too think that there is a lot going on in that family and that kind of public display is not going to help.

  14. Samantha@IW says

    February 11, 2012 at 6:48 am

    Google “Tommy Jordan facebook page” his account is currently open and you see what’s happened since and what’s happening now. GMA showed up and CBS has offered them a show. He wasn’t prepared for this kind of far reaching attention!

  15. Samantha@IW says

    February 11, 2012 at 6:50 am

    Just wanted to post this excerpt from his page because I thought it was a great point, for kids and adults alike.

    We agreed we learned two collective lessons from this so far:

    First: As her father, I’ll definitely do what I say I will, both positive and negative and she can depend on that. She no longer has any doubt about that.

    Second: We have always told her what you put online can affect you forever. Years later a single Facebook/MySpace/Twitter comment can affect her eligibility for a good job and can even get her fired from a job she already has. She’s seen first-hand through this video the worst possible scenario that can happen. One post, made by her Dad, will probably follow him the rest of his life; just like those mean things she said on Facebook will stick with the people her words hurt for a long time to come. Once you put it out there, you can’t take it back, so think carefully before you use the internet to broadcast your thoughts and feelings.

  16. Pam@IW says

    February 11, 2012 at 7:15 am

    Here is a link to his Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/tommyjordaniii

  17. stu says

    February 11, 2012 at 9:47 am

    My Hero! Love the line …..I’m going to post it to your Facebook page…not that you’ll be able to see it.
    He just did what a lot of parents would love to do.

  18. stu says

    February 11, 2012 at 9:53 am

    After reading his response to what he did…he seems pretty normal to me.

  19. Techspert says

    February 11, 2012 at 1:34 pm

    Just checking my new beta iPhone ap

  20. Pam@IW says

    February 13, 2012 at 9:55 am

    So did this guy end up on any morning shows today? Is there still a big flurry of activity surrounding this?

  21. Jennie@IW says

    February 13, 2012 at 1:52 pm

    I fall into the camp that totally understands the impulse and *kind of* wants to applaud the father but 1) thinks the public nature of the business is probably detrimental to the daughter and the relationship and 2) thinks shooting the laptop is too violent (I’m afraid of guns) and needlessly destructive aside. It would be a great scene in a movie, where we don’t have to worry about real life feelings and consequences. But for actualy real life, I think it went too far.

  22. snickers says

    February 13, 2012 at 2:02 pm

    Pam,

    I saw the clip on Fox news today. I hope it ends now for his daughters feelings.

  23. Kmom2 says

    February 13, 2012 at 2:16 pm

    The exerpt from his facebook page leads me to believe he had threatened to destroy the laptop from a previous incident. It happened again so he followed thru on his threat. I think if the “crime” or disrespect or infraction happens publically, I think the punishment should happen publically. I’m sorry…..it worked for my son and I would do it again in a heartbeat. I banked on reverse peer pressure working to get my son away from pot by letting the parents of all his friends know what he was up to and it worked in a most effective manner. That was a year and a half ago, and the kid has been clean since.

  24. Kmom2 says

    February 13, 2012 at 2:18 pm

    Jennie I can understand the needlessly destructive part of your comment, but I’d bet my paycheck that the daughter was counting on that too. The old “that cost a lot of money, he would never do that” teenage syndrome. I guess the father proved her wrong, and I bet she never discounts his word again.

  25. HB says

    February 13, 2012 at 3:06 pm

    A local DC talk show chatted about the video this a.m.! It was a short segment…w/o exception, all callers either felt the father’s anger appropriate…considering WHERE he lived…OR callers felt…they’d come close to throwing their own teen’s computers out the window. The radio host said he’d read that the father has refused to make any further public comments, t.v. shows etc. He’d made his point. BUT his daughter was quoted as saying…[sic] ‘maybe the cell phone could be next. At the rate they were going, her college would be paid for’. I don’t know how YouTube works, but apparently it’s monetized & they made out fairly well.

  26. Anya@IW says

    February 13, 2012 at 7:09 pm

    Samantha, thanks for posting the dad’s follow-up thoughts. He makes some excellent points. So while I don’t agree with his ‘approach’, I understand his POV and I think his daughter will benefit from a parent who is consistent and follows through on their word.

  27. Samantha@IW says

    February 13, 2012 at 8:03 pm

    Pam- so far he’s refused tv outlets.

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