By Nicola Winters
Divorce rates are on the rise and the number of marriages that fail the test of time is soaring. It now appears that more couples are separating than staying together, however that doesn’t mean that at the first sight of trouble we should all throw the towel in.
Divorce is, sometimes, the only option for some couples. Unfortunately there is nothing else that can be done to save the marriage and the relationship. However, before deciding on this drastic measure, here are some tips that can help restore and salvage the relationship:
Prioritizing between work, social and home commitments can be an extremely difficult task for any individual. Many couples split simply because they failed to spend quality time with each other.
At the beginning of any relationship we ensure that we spend as much time with each other as possible, making arrangements, trips and days out are a regular thing. However, after the initial stages, work, family and friends all seem to get in the way. It may be worth arranging a visit to one of the places you remember you both enjoyed. It may be a holiday destination, a restaurant or a bar. By re-visiting these places you are compelled to talk about your memories of that place and that day; happy memories. It may be that all you need is to escape the stress of everyday life every now and again to fully appreciate each other.
If this doesn’t work then it may be worth trying a trial separation. Everybody needs time alone and a little space every now and again. By being alone, you are able to clear your thoughts, make realistic plans for the future and decide exactly where your priorities lie without the added of pressure of outside distractions. If home life is proving a tense experience, this will be the perfect way to review the state of the relationship.
Many couples refuse to visit marriage counselors and mediation groups. There is a common misconception that these counselors are unqualified and unnecessary professionals. However, attending such sessions is a great way of off-loading all of your worries and anxieties. By talking to a third party, you are able to fully disclose intimate details of your relationship, something which you would rarely do elsewhere, and uncover the real reasons behind the break down. A marriage counselor can also offer couples different ways of communicating with each other by teaching you both to accept blame, admit faults and deal with guilt. This can make a huge difference to the way you view you both view your marriage.
In relationships and marriages where there is abuse or violence, divorce is definitely the best option. However, if you feel that there is simply a lack of communication, a lack of quality time being spent together or family life is proving too demanding, it may be worth trying to rekindle that time with your spouse. No couple sets out to divorce so why let it happen?
This is a guest post by Nicola Winters, a UK blogger who enjoys writing about sport, art and life in general.