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Celebrity Gossip Roundup

By IW Team Member

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By Jennie

It’s a brand new year, and with new years come resolutions. I resolve to avoid writing about Michael Lohan for as long as possible. Uh oh, did I just break the resolution by mentioning the resolution? Is it like Fight Club? I’ll have to check the official resolution handbook on that one. Until then, there is plenty of gossip to keep us entertained through the dreary days of January.

We all know, of course, that musical royalty was born this past weekend. Beyonce and Jay-Z are parents. Of a daughter named Blue Ivy, born at Lenox Hill Hospital in NYC. Early reports had indicated the name was Ivy Blue, because Blue Ivy sounds like the name of a cut-rate tiki lounge in Honolulu or a third tier super-hero, one whose only skill is climbing up brick walls…but anyway. That’s about all we know for sure – many other details are swathed in controversy:

  • Whether the child was born in a scheduled c-section or delivered naturally;
  • Whether the child came out of Beyonce’s body, was delivered of a surrogate or hatched out of a diamond-encrusted golden egg;
  • Whether the happy parents’ bodyguards prevented a new father from going into the ICU to visit his preemie twins, or possibly cordoned off the entire island of Manhattan and had its denizens rounded up and placed in pens in the New Jersey Pine Barrens until the blessed child is ready to go home/start kindergarten/graduate from college;
  • Whether Suri Cruise is at this very moment sticking pins in a tiny baby doll while chanting “I’m the star, I’m the star” over and over.

Um, unbelievable as it may seem, the Earth has continued to rotate on its axis while these questions await answers. Shocking, I know.

The Kardashian Klan is once again beset by rumors that the tallest Kardashian is no Kardashian at all. Scandalous! We know it’s not Khloe K.’s penchant for privacy that marks her as different from her siblings; she’s as dedicated to the Kardashian brand of Public Living for Fun and Profit as any of them. But it’s been noted that, in addition to being like a foot taller than her petite sisters, Khloe doesn’t share the strong resemblance that marks Kim, Kourtney, Krobert and all the other little Kardashians as members of the same gene pool. Also, she appears to be about 33% more likable than her sisters, which is strange given that she was raised by the she-wolf known as Kris. The rumor that Khloe was fathered by someone else was again floated this week by two skanks ex-wives of Robert Kardashian. Given the Kardashian kids’ obvious devotion to their late father, publically spreading such tales is pretty low. He claimed her, he raised her; he’s her father. End of story, in my opinion.

Now, as to whether Prince Harry was fathered by James Hewitt…

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie visited the White House this week, ostensibly to discuss Jolie’s humanitarian work, but really because let’s face it: if you were president wouldn’t you totally make the most awesome citizens in the country come visit you? I would’ve been on Brangelina by the second week of February, 2009, personally. But I’m a fangirl. Obviously Barack and Michelle wanted to play it a little cooler. I don’t agree with their strategy, but I respect it.

Best wishes to actress Heather Locklear, who was recently hospitalized. There are reports that she mixed prescription drugs and alcohol, prompting a call to 911. Locklear has had some troubles in recent years, but she’s always seemed a sweet and decent person. She first came to prominence as the trashy Sammy Jo on Dynasty, but personally we remember her first as Tommy’s girlfriend on Eight is Enough, more than 30 years ago (yikes!). Get well soon, Heather!
.

Related posts:

Celebrity News Roundup: Splits, Tiffs and Losers
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Filed Under: Celebrities, Entertainment, News-2 Tagged With: Angelina Jolie, ardashian, Beyone, Blue Ivy Carter, Brad Pitt, Heather Locklear, Jay-Z, White House

Comments

  1. Ann @ IW says

    January 13, 2012 at 10:20 am

    He claimed her, he raised her; he’s her father. End of story, in my opinion.

    Mine, too.

  2. Ann @ IW says

    January 13, 2012 at 10:30 am

    Heather Locklear…Tommy’s girlfriend and then she was a vixen on Dynasty, wasn’t she? Awww, those hokey shows…the good ol’ days!

  3. Lily@IW says

    January 13, 2012 at 2:11 pm

    Another great roundup Jennie. Thanks for my celeb gossip fix.

  4. Jen says

    January 13, 2012 at 4:54 pm

    Whether Suri Cruise is at this very moment sticking pins in a tiny baby doll while chanting “I’m the star, I’m the star” over and over.
    _______________________________________________

    Heehee. or “Mirror, Mirror on the wall…who’s the prettiest celebrity baby of them all…”

  5. Pam@IW says

    January 15, 2012 at 7:26 am

    Great recap, Jennie! I can’t believe I missed the birth of Beyonce’s baby! Can you tell how much I care? I am sure she is in some type of diamond encrusted sleepwear or crib. What does everyone think of the name Blue Ivy? I have always like the name Ivy. Does anyone remember the western “The High Chaparral”? There was a character on that show named Blue Boy. That was one of my favorite westerns but actually I loved them all.
    .
    Best wishes for Heather Locklear also. I did not know she was Tommy’s girlfriend on Eight Is Enough. I loved that show. Do they have re-runs? I would love to watch just one episode.

  6. JennieIW says

    January 15, 2012 at 11:20 pm

    I don’t think Eight is Enough is on re-runs anywhere now, but I could be wrong. I did love that show back in the day – both in first run and the re-runs they initially had on in the 80s.
    .
    I don’t care for Blue Ivy. I don’t mind unusual names, but an adjective followed by a noun just sounds weird. Not like a person’s name.

  7. MsGoody2Shoes says

    January 16, 2012 at 4:24 pm

    I enjoyed the article. It was funny too.

  8. Holly says

    January 24, 2012 at 6:49 pm

    Celebrities are in their own World! I read this today:

    LOS ANGELES (AP) — A spokeswoman for Demi Moore says the actress is seeking professional help to treat her exhaustion and improve her health.

    Publicist Carrie Gordon says the decision is due to the stresses in Moore’s life, and she looks forward to getting well.
    Then I read this:
    1/23/2012: Saying it is an “amicable process”, the Seal and Heidi Klum issued a joint statement about their separation: “While we have enjoyed seven very loving, loyal and happy years of marriage, after much soul searching we have decided to separate. We have had the deepest respect for one another throughout our relationship and continue to love each other very much, but we have grown apart.
    Seriously! Demi Moore is exhausted, then I am Miss America! Seal and Heidi “continue to love each other but have grown apart” seems like a “merger” not a marriage! This is all pretty pathetic!

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